9 hours to Elec1102 Paper

www.xanga.com/vinjoy has vanished from internet. Ithink I need a new start, for myself, for everyone. My first paper for this exam will commence in less than 12 hours time. Shits have been happening for the past one month but everyone who was involved promised to not bring it up again. At that point, I thought I was right, apparently everything I did was wrong. I have been asking myself the same question, how did all these happen?

For the whole 19 years of my life, shits like that had never ever happen, hereby I would also love to thanks those who accepted my apologise after the shit I have done to them. I was pampered, by my family, close friends and everyone around me. I didnt learn my mistake from the last incident and lately I repeated the same thing so in the end, I screwed myself. I was so childish, bitchy, annoying, and inconsiderate. For those who thinks Im a great friend to be with, please dont think that way, looks can be deceiving, there are so much of me underneath that I dont think I will reveal to anyone anymore.

I no longer trust anyone, and people around me dont trust me either. Im learning to get close to people yet I am afraid to try. The biggest mistake I have done ever since I came to sydney was trusting every single person around me. Trusting others aint a bad thing but when it comes to a point where the person is not trust worthy, u're in deep shit.

I wish not only me, but everyone who knows the shit that happened last month learn a lesson from it. It may look as if Im the only one who created the shit but have a deep thought about it, put yourself in my shoe, it's always easy for a person to say " yeh i wont do things like what she does", but when u're in the situation, everything isnt under your control and they just dont go the way u want it to be. Maybe it's the way I think, Im a chicken, a coward, who has no guts to confront people, been telling everyone that, but the reason behind it is because I think it hurts alot to a friend(especially a close friend) when u give it right on their face, people might disagree with this but thats what I have been thinking because if someone ever do that to me, I will feel pretty bad. Gaps in between will grow bigger and bigger as time goes by. A true friend might not act that way, but how many true friends are there in your life? To me, just 2, those are the ones who will really forgive me for everything I did.

Okay I think I'd better cut everything short and head to bed. My paper's @ 9:20am @ Wentworth Terrace Room. I hope things will go fine til exams end.